Death Note Deaths
by Terrenis
Summary: Kira aka Light stumbles over an interesting website und suddenly gets very creative ideas how to kill...Just a series of OneShots as an excuse to kill off annoying Death Note Charas…


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**Death Note Deaths**

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**By Terrenis-chan**

E-Mail: Terrenis(a)web.de

Part: 1/1

Rating: PG - 16

Pairing: Light x L

Warning: AU, very OOC, maybe a little bit lime, humour, death...

Summary: Kira stumbles over an interesting website und suddenly gets very creative ideas how to kill...Just a series of One-Shots as an excuse to kill off all annoying Death Note Charas…

Disclaimer: Unfortunately all bishies as well as the Darwin Awards don't belong to me, but to their respective owners. If they were mine, I would be so happy. sighs and sniffs

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This is my first attempt at a Death Note Fic since I got into the Fandom a few months ago. I hope you like it.

Enjoy it!!!

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oOo I. Matsuda oOo

It was again one of these days where Light wished that he never had picked up the Death Note. Not that he had regretted it until now, but it was simply a deadly boring day, at last for him. Normally he and the others would have been busy with their investigation to catch Kira, wouldn't it be for the fact that L, aka the World's Greatest Detective, was too occupied with his new hobby to continue their research.

Yes, the great L had a hobby in the form of a cute tropical goldfish, which he had gotten for his birthday from one of the stupid idiots of the taskforce (Although Light knew exactly that Matsuda was the culprit!).Strangely enough, L had been overjoyed about his present and given him the most creative name in the world – "Fishie".

Ever since that time, life had become dull and monotonous because the black-haired man seemed to lost have any interest in Kira and looked after Fishie twenty-four hours a day, not to mention that their sex life had almost become nonexistent.

As a substitute, Light spend his days surfing on the internet, looking for new criminals for Misa to kill and other things. Today was no different. But in contrast to the other days, Lady Luck seemed to be on Light's side. While surfing, the brown-haired student had stumbled over a very interesting website with many interesting stories.

The more he read, the more he started to grin until he couldn't resist letting out an evil cackle. This site was perfect. He just had gotten so many naughty ideas und he couldn't wait to carry them out, especially to get rid of some nuisances and L back into his bed.

Light cackled again. Maybe the next days wouldn't be boring at all.

oOo

Two days later, the whole headquarters was in uproar.

No, neither was it a celebration because Kira had been caught nor was it a public holiday. It was just Matsuda's birthday and L had been so generous to throw a small birthday party for him with lots of cake and alcohol. L himself was not present since Fishie required his full attention and Light stayed in the corner where the computer und did what he always did. He simply wasn't the Party type.

That didn't stop the other members of the taskforce to celebrate Matsuda's anniversary loudly and very merry. Even Soichiro, Lights father, had joined in and was now drinking his third beer. Light sighed. He knew if the party would be going on like this they would have more than just one hangover tomorrow. If only L was here…

Speaking of the devil… Just at that moment the door opened and a certain insomniac stepped in to join the party.

"Hey, look who's alive!" Light replied sarcastically.

"Light does sound bored!" L said and took the seat next to the student.

"Oh really! Who'd have thought that?"

"There is no need to be sarcastic!"

Light mumbled something indefinable under his breath.

"What did Light say?"

"I just wanted to know how Fishie is!"

"Oh, he's fine. Goldfishes are such fascinating creatures." L said and put a strawberry from the remains of the birthday cake in his mouth.

"By the way, I need to leave for a while. I'm out of Pocky and fish food and Watari isn't here to buy it, so I'm going to the store getting some new. I hope Light can handle our guests for a while. I should be back in half an hour or so."

"Sure. I'm a grown boy!" Light sighed.

"That's fine!" L smiled and patted Light's head as if he was a small child, earning an evil glare from this one.

Then the detective got up and shuffled out of the room leaving Light once again on his own. This one sighed for the third time in a row. Life could be so cruel.

25 minutes later, Light was ready to kill everyone else in the room. Everyone, especially Aizawa, Matsuda and Mogi, were as drunk as one could be after 10 beers in a row. But that wasn't the worst thing. The worst thing was that, Light believed it was shortly after L had left, someone had the great idea to play Dare or Truth as a Strip Version. Right now, three of the four policemen were only wearing their underwear, including Light's father.

Only Matsuda was still wearing his shirt and trousers. And it was his turn now.

"Okay, Matsuda! Truth or Dare?" Aizawa asked the younger Man.

Matsuda giggled.

"I choose Dare!" he said and took another sip from his beer bottle.

"Okay! I dare you to swallow L's goldfish in one piece." Aizawa said grinning.

"Alright! I'll do it!"

Matsuda got up, swaying heavily, and somehow stumbled in the room next to the one in which they were now. Two minutes later he returned with a wriggling fish in his fingers. Then he lifted the fish high above and opened his mouth, while his colleagues encouraged him loudly.

"MAT-SU-DA! MAT-SU-DA! MAT-SU-DA! MAT-SU-DA!"

And then he swallowed the goldfish.

Aizawa, Mogi and his father cheered when he did so, not noticing that the young policeman suddenly started to choke. But when he began to turn blue and collapsed, they jumped up, realizing that something could be amiss.

Light, who had watched them the whole time, was grinning now. Things certainly were getting interesting now. For a moment he wondered what L would say if he found his goldfish missing, but strangely he didn't care.

Speaking of L… Just at the moment when Matsuda had swallowed the fish, the black-haired detective returned with a full bag, munching happily a pack of Pocky. Without paying attention to the party guests who attempted to resuscitate the now still form of Matsuda, L strode into his room. Five seconds later, a loud scream reverberated through the entire headquarters.

Light decided to help his boyfriend and also went into L's room. A little bit later he led a shocked L back into the main room.

"Fishie, where's my Fishie?" L stammered.

Light just pointed at Matsuda and promptly L snapped out of his reverie and threw himself on Matsuda's form, trying to choke him.

"Where's my Fishie? Give it back!" the black-haired man screamed furiously.

Aizawa and Soichiro had their hands full to pull the detective back.

"Calm down, Ryuuzaki! He's already dead!" Soichiro exclaimed.

"What? How?"

"He, ahem, sort of swallowed your goldfish as a dare! Who should have known that he would be too big for his mouth?"

L's eyebrows started to jerk at that and he opened Matsuda's Mouth only to see the jerking tail of his Fishie.

"Fishie…!" L whimpered.

Light sighed and took L's hand to pull him up.

"Come on, L. It's too late for him! I'll bring you to bed."

The detective just nodded. Light smiled slightly and led the traumatized L out of the room, smirking internally.

Who would have thought that his new idea would work that great? He couldn't wait to test the other ideas.

oOo

To be continued?

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Yes, Matsuda was the first one. Don't misunderstand me. I like Matsuda. He's one of my favourite DN Charas, that's why he had the honour to be my first victim. But who's gonna be killed off next? I'm taking requests for the next chapter.

Hate this fic? Like this fic? Want more?

Let me know:

Terrenis(a)web.de

Terrenis-chan


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